Valley PR Blog

Hate that client or co-worker? Ask them a favor

By Linda VandeVrede on May 10th, 2010 In Best Practices

Here’s a way to deal with the Monday morning blues of facing a client or co-worker you just don’t like.   According to Robert Cialdini, author of “Yes!” and “Influence: Science and Practice,” take a tip from Benjamin Franklin and ask a favor of them.

Franklin worked with a hostile counterpart in the Pennsylvania legislature at one point during his career.   Instead of being transparently obsequious, Franklin asked the legislator if he could borrow a very rare book from his library.   Franklin perused it for a few days and returned it promptly with a note.  After that point, the gentleman always spoke in a civil manner to Franklin and they remained lifelong friends.   Why?

According to Cialdini, who is a Regent’s Professor of Psychology and Marketing at ASU, “people are strongly motivated to change their attitudes in ways that are consistent with their behavior.”  When you find yourself doing a favor for someone you previously didn’t like, you challenge your assumptions about that person, because you question why you are going out of your way for someone so insidious.   It causes you to consider their redeeming qualities in a new light to match your behavior.

Cialdini presented to the Public Relations Society of America Counselor’s Academy a few years ago when the event was held in Phoenix.  You can find out more about his books and his workshops at his website, www.influenceatwork.com

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